There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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