Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Who wears a wallet chain?!
so let's talk penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize