He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
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i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
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Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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