i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize