This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
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