They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
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He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
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She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
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