just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
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i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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