You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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