he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
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it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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