If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
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I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
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I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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