Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
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My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
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Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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