i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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