I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize