do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Terrible idea I love it
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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