she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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