But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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