ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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