woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize