the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize