I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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