Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I wish you could order shots online.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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