idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
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