he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize