She announced her abortion via fbk
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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