sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize