I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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