So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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