Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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