I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I'm jealous of your bromance
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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