If i could tip my vagina, i would.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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