chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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