He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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