omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
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