nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize