Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize