i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize