People in love make me want to vomit
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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