the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize