Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
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