we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
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