I think im going to throw up on grandma
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
i out mim tonsoeep
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