Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
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he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
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I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
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