out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
We have started to decorate penises.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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