Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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