and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
How did I end up in the pool?!
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
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