Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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