this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize