Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
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