ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
you made out with another girl for some wings
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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