can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
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If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
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Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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